Bonus Saturday Post: You’ll Never Quite Get It

Fellow husbands:

You’ll never quite get it.  As much as you think you’ll remember, you won’t always remember to take the trash down to the road.  No matter how many times you promise to get all the dishes done, your day will always seem way too full.  And whenever you put the anniversary of your first date into your phone, you will inevitably upgrade and forget to transfer all the data.

Whenever I look back, sometimes all I can remember is failure.  Sometimes all I have to do is look at earlier that day.  Like for instance, accidentally throwing a harmful word out as a playful one and hurting Beth’s feelings.  In the (I keep upgrading phones) number of years that we’ve been together, I’ve never used a term like that.  It wasn’t degrading to women, but she felt insulted.  And that is, after all, the main point.  Isn’t it?

For decades, we men have been portrayed on television as bumbling idiots married to well put together women.  From The Dick Van Dyke Show, to Everybody Loves Raymond, I have faithfully watched men find a way to screw up, and then spend the rest of the show trying to fix it before their wife finds out.  It’s a tragedy when art imitates life.  But after all, they did have to get the idea from somewhere.

So what is it?  Do we blame how women think of us on sitcom tv show portrayal?  Do we call them feminists (btw, that isn’t how feminism actually works)?  Do we promise to do better, knowing we’ll get the same results next time?

None of  the above, actually.

All of these shows, and all of these instances just assume you are doing it alone.  They assume that all you are supposed to do is impress your wife or keep her happy.  Sometimes the social norm makes you off to be a bumbling idiot.  Behind every successful man is a surprised mother-in-law.  Behind every successful man is a tired woman.

Let’s take a look at that and say, “Beside every successful man is his wife.”  You aren’t doing it alone.  You have a helpmeet.  Share with her your insecurities and ask for her help.  Because alone, you’ll never quite get it.

 

My name goes here,
JT

PS – Also, just for the record, when your wife takes a picture on snapchat and uses the filter to put a skinny beard on her face…just assume she’ll get mad if you tell her she looks just like Mark Ballas.  I got lucky on this one.  But you may not.

 

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